I said that I would do a more complete post on Thursday's Critics Choice Awards AKA The Sears Roebuck Oscars, but I'm not going to devote much energy to it. With the Globes Sunday and Miss America tonight, does anyone really care that much? Here's a brief recap:
The hosts were Paul Sheer and Rob Huebel who are allegedly some sort of comedy duo. Last year's host was Kristin Chenowith. I guess they couldn't meet her price again. The audience was subjected to the lamest, most predictable bits delivered with all the panache of amateur night at the VFW Hall. The camera kept panning to the audience to get stars' reactions, and they weren't even pretending to laugh. Jessica Chastain looked bored to tears. George Clooney looked like he needed a drink. Ben Kingsley looked like he wanted to kill his manager for signing him up for this shit. It went on like this all night.
There was one good bit when the Muppet grouches came out. You know those two old men who sit in the balcony and complain about how the show sucks? Talk about a target rich environment for those guys. One Muppet mentioned the movie J. Edgar and the other said "You dated J. Edgar." Best line of the night and do we now have our first officially out gay Muppet?
There was a long, boring tribute to Martin Scorsese who got the lifetime achievement award (who knew there was any entity left on earth that hadn't given him a lifetime achievement award). There were musical interludes from Fitz and the Tantrums who I have never heard of, but I'm not exactly their demographic. There were a few stunning gowns, especially from Viola Davis and Diane Kruger, but otherwise, the evening was a snooze fest. Did we learn anything about likely Oscar contenders? Probably not, but here is the list of winners.
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2 comments:
With both the Golden Globes and the Miss America Pageant, the Gay Police will be out in force. Watch the food and wine pairings and service! I understand that this year, rather than issuing tickets, they are requiring remedial training based on aversion therapy. It appears there is a lot of 700 Club and NASCAR involved. Be careful out there!
Thank you, Dear. If someone had to watch the Critics Choice "Awards," it might as well have been you -- and not me. With both Miss America and the Golden Globes, things must be hoppin' at Lazy Circles' headquarters this weekend...? The gowns! The hair and makeup people! The flowing champagne! The pesky press corps!
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