SmashCaps: Another Openin', Another Show

Happy Birthday, Mr. President

The opening of this episode is, well, Smashing!  Newly-minted Tony nominee Christian Borle sings "Another Opening, Another Show" from Kiss Me Kate (which I saw the very day I met LC NY Bureau Chief Doug, if you'll excuse the personal moment) while the kids from Fame Glee Bombshell dash about Grand Central Station on their way to out-of-town previews in Boston!  This is great!  This is what we've been waiting for!  For once, Smash is living up to its potential as a show about the excitement of Broadway!

Then, the soap opera continues.

Julia and the wasted Brian d'Arcy James are back together, blah, blah, blah, who cares?  

Dev in see-through tee.  Be still my beating heart.

Raza Jaffrey as Dev is talking to Karen while wearing a thin, see-through Henley T-shirt.  I have no idea what they're talking about.  

The gang is in Boston and the actor who plays Joe DiMaggio pops on stage long enough to tell Derek and Rebecca the Movie Star that he's gotten a pilot and he's not doing Bombshell any more.  Boom, he's gone. Obviously, this no-name guy has a very flexible contract that allows him to walk away from the show two days before the first preview performance with no repercussions at all.   Bye Joe, have a great life!  

OMG, Joe's gone and Rebecca's a nervous wreck!  The only answer is to hire Leading Man Michael who almost broke up Julia's marriage!  After all, he knows the show and there are only two days before the first performance!  This storyline doesn't sound at all like a contrived or lazy way to get Julia's man whore back in her life, nossir.  It's totally organic to the story.    

Anyhoo, Dev makes a couple of loving, supportive calls to Karen offering to come to Boston to see her opening.  She's kind of an unreasonable bitch and tells him basically, she's too busy and she's sharing a hotel room with another girl, and she won't have any free time, whatever, whatever, whatever.  What a fool.  Right on cue, Hot Iranian Girl shows up at Dev's apartment with a bottle of booze and a soft shoulder to cry on.  They make out for like 3 seconds and he pushes her away saying "I can't, I can't."  What a sap.  

HIG with seduction booze.

Rebecca does Happy Birthday Mr. President for Derek because it's his birthday, then they giggle and feed each other cake, as if someone who looks like Uma Thurman has eaten cake since 1977.  

Dev shows up in the theater with roses for Karen.  Karen says thanks and dashes off without even taking the flowers because, you see, they're IN TECH!  Doesn't he understand the rigors of TECH?  

Tom meets Sam's family that conveniently lives in Boston.  Sam's dad dissaproves of Sam's choice of frog-faced boyfriends gay lifestyle a career as a dancer.  That's right, the big father/son drama is over Sam's career in dance.  Don't think this is some subtle way of expressing dad's homophobia. No, the entire family is over-the-top supportive of Sam the gay.  They're just not thrilled about dancers.  Tom slightly agrees with Sam's dad that dancers have short careers and naturally Sam overhears.  This leads to a confrontation between Tom and Sam on the porch of Sam's family's picturesque Victorian. This lasts about a minute before Tom and Sam kiss and make up.  End of drama.

Sam  wonders why a guy as cute as he is doesn't have a better looking boyfriend.

Rebecca's still a nervous wreck.  Derek fucks her in her dressing room to calm her down.  I've heard of worse methods.  Ivy hears them giggling through the closed door.  Totally cute Tony nominee Sean Dugan bars her way.  She figures out what's going on.  Smart gal, that Ivy.  

Dev and Karen have a romantic dinner because there's so much free time for romantic dinners two days before the first performance when the leading man has just quit.  He proposes.  I swoon and scream "I DO!" at the TV.  Karen looks at the ring and says "I'm in tech."  No, seriously, that's what she says.    

Karen dashes back to the hotel which must be close to the romantic restaurant because it takes her like two seconds, and the Bombshell kids are having a party!  They're boozing it up and dancing because there's so much time to party two days before the first performance when the leading man just quit.  Wesley Taylor as chorus boy Bobby has some seriously sexy moves.  They really need to expand his part.  Just saying.  So, Karen joins the gang and lets them know she's depressed and Bobby suggests a sing off!  Ivy goes first and sings the shit out of a song apparently called "I'm Going Down."  Megan Hilty consistently proves that she's a real star.  Karen doesn't sing which is wise because Ivy is the shit, people!

Ivy reading my mind.

Dev shows up just as Ivy finishes her song.  Where has he been?  Parking the car?  He and Karen go for a moonlight walk along the Charles which must be just outside their hotel which also must be right next door to the romantic restaurant.  Dev tells Karen that he kissed HIG, which is really dumb.  I mean seriously, all he did was kiss her and push her away.  Karen says she doesn't want to be with a man who's cheated on her and runs away.  Dev drowns his sorrows in a seedy bar which must be close to the Charles River/Hotel/Romantic restaurant.  Who should sit on the barstool next to him but Ivy whom he has apparently never seen before.  Really?  He has no idea who she is?  She gives him a smoldering look and he buys her a vodka soda.

This episode was called Tech because they talked endlessly about how tough it is to be IN TECH!  Unless you need time for romantic dinners/hotel room sing-offs/fuck sessions with the leading lady then Tech's not so bad.